2 Male, 2 Female, 3 Non Gender Specific, 7 Dwarfs, 7 Supporting Roles + Chorus (Indicated genders are guidelines for casting. Many roles could be played by actors of any gender. Oh yes they could!)
- Snow White (F) The most talented girl in the land
- Prince Charles (M/F) The fair prince of the land
- Nora Virus (M) Snow White’s nursery maid & local washerwoman
- Muddles (M/F) Nora Virus’s son and court jester
- Queen Malevolent (F) The evil queen of Meinfahrt
- Heinrich the Hunter (M) Malevolent’s aide, thick but strong
- Mirror Mirror (M/F) The spirit of the magical mirror
The Dwarfs (M/F)
- Sarg Head dwarf and clever guy
- Jokey Never speaks without a pun
- Giggles Hangs round with Jokey
- Miserable Gets irritated by Jokey and Giggles
- Blondie Your stereotypical blonde
- Hippy Chilled out and
- Oldie Ancient dwarf who has a zimmer frame
Supporting Roles (M/F)
- The Snowman (M/F) The Queen’s pet abominable snow man
- Richard (M) Royal Messenger from England
- Luca (M) Citizen of Meinfahrt
- Liesel (F) Citizen of Meinfahrt
- Luisa (F) Citizen of Meinfahrt
- Frieda (F) Citizen of Meinfahrt
- Franziska (F) Citizen of Meinfahrt
- Other citizens of Meinfahrt
- Forest Dwellers
4 or 5 Full Scenes, 3 or 4 Front Cloths/Curtain Scenes Act I
- Scene 1 The Castle of Meinfahrt
- Scene 2 A Corridor in the Castle
- Scene 3 Queen Malevolent’s Boudoir
- Scene 4 The Castle Dungeons
- Scene 5 The Castle Laundry
- Scene 6 The Diamond Mine
- Scene 7 The Frozen Forest
- Scene 1 The Dwarf’s Cottage
- Scene 2 A Path in The Frozen Forest
- Scene 3 Queen Malevolent’s Boudoir
- Scene 4 The Diamond Mine
- Scene 5 The Frozen Forest
- Scene 6 Song Sheet
- Scene 7 Finale
QUEEN M. (Evil cackle) Good gracious me, look at you all. You really are disgusting. No one uglier this side of *local place name*. Especially you sir in the front row, you could have at least put a comb through your hair. What’s that? My apologies madame.
MIRROR Oi Queeny, leave them alone and pick on someone your own size.
QUEEN M. Ahhh, Mirror Mirror I thought I could smell something foul around here.
MIRROR Right that’s it, I’m coming out.
QUEEN M. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the stage my magic mirror!
(MIRROR MIRROR exits the frame)
MIRROR (Bows) Your majesty, (Bows again) Everyone.
QUEEN M. So nice to see you again mirror. It’s been too long.
MIRROR You check your face in me every 5 minutes.
QUEEN M. Hold your tongue or I shall bully you instead.
MIRROR You know, normally bullies only bully because they’ve been bullied themselves.
QUEEN M. What could I possibly have been bullied for, look at me, I’m beautiful.
MIRROR You can be as beautiful as you like, but that doesn’t make you a nice person.
QUEEN M. But dear, beauty is all I need. Don’t you think?
MIRROR If you say so.
QUEEN M. Mirror Mirror, tell me true, who’s the fairest known to you?
MIRROR You think you’re the fairest in the land,
But there’s another, she’s far more grand.
She’s a beauty, yes, and that’s a start,
But her fairness is in the beauty of her heart.
QUEEN M. That’s not what you’re supposed to say. (Aside) Must be something wrong with it. I’ll try again. (She repositions herself) Mirror Mirror, are you sure? No one is this beautiful, and more.
MIRROR I’m sorry Queeny, you heard me right
While you are the most beautiful in my sight
There’s another star who shines more bright
She’s well known to you, her name’s Snow White
QUEEN M. Snow White? Damn her, I should never have married her stupid father. That’s it. Mirror, I don’t need you any longer, get out of my sight.
(MIRROR MIRROR exits)
I’m off to find the ‘fair’ Snow White and make sure she never takes my crown, ever again! (Evil laugh)